One of the most difficult tasks in our lives is to find an activity that relaxes and recharges. At the same time, it's definitely worth looking around, because in addition to the well-being of our family, it's also important to spend time and energy on self-care. After all, a family can function well if everyone has the opportunity to recharge, which helps them to tackle everyday struggles with renewed strength.
Mental exhaustion can mainly affect mothers with small children, which can be greatly helped by suitable leisure activities and hobbies. In the early period with a baby, many people are happy if they have enough time to rest, sleep or take care of everyday tasks. However, once the routine is established and the baby's rhythm becomes predictable, many people feel that there would be time for other activities in addition to housework and taking care of the family. In such cases, it is worth thinking about whether there is something that will fill you up on a daily basis and help you get through the days when you are driving squirrel wheels.
Of course, this problem does not only affect mothers, as everyone needs relaxation. A lack of self-care can often lead to boredom, withdrawal or, in more serious cases, depression. Not only do our family members and friends need us, but it is also important to keep in mind what we need and to take care of our own well-being as well.
What is self-care?
"Self-care is any activity that we do in some form for our own well-being. This includes preserving our physical and mental health, taking care of our physical environment, nurturing our relationships, dealing with our emotions, developing our creativity, knowledge, abilities, and skills, our spiritual development, consolidating our financial situation, and making any contribution to making the world a better place. " (Source: https://pszichoforyou.hu/az-ongondoskodas-fontossaga/)
How to start looking for a hobby?
Think about what activities you like to do with your children as a mother. This can be quite informative for your future hobby. After all, during joint play with the children, it turns out that the number of possibilities in the search for an "adult hobby" is endless. For example, do you like to play Legos, plasticine or color? To create something creatively and freely from nothing? Or, let's say, create something based on pre-made instructions? (e.g. paint by number, sewing, knitting, crocheting, baking, etc.) Or do you prefer movement? (e.g. cycling, running, thematic training, etc.) Do you enjoy reading? Whatever hobby/activity you choose, the main thing is to have fun.
Photo: Pexels (www.pexels.com)
How do we find time for our hobbies?
You should think about what you used to do when the children went to bed. Do you watch TV? Are you on the phone? Are you packing? From which activity could you "regroup" even a little time, to an activity that relaxes or recharges you? There are certainly people in your family and surroundings who can help you create some me-time. (e.g. father, grandparent, babysitter) If father can take on Saturday morning while mother is away for 1-2 hours, it is useful in several ways, as you get time for yourself, while the father-child relationship is also enriched with experiences. Plus, if you get really excited about the idea of an activity, you'll find that you have more free time in your day than you thought. Maybe not every day… but how about a few more free hours during the week? It can be something as simple as turning off the TV or putting down the phone, wrapping the kids or your partner in the wrap. For example, for “language learning” you might download an app or get up a little earlier in the morning some days of the week. Or maybe you do your yoga practice in your living room instead of the gym. There are already many great online options for doing different hobbies at home. With conscious planning and organization, it is a little easier to find time for your new hobby.
What is a good hobby?
The right hobby gives you a "flow" experience. What is flow? "Flow is an ecstatic state characterized by feelings of joy and happiness. We can experience it when we completely forget about an activity.” /Csíkszentmihályi M./
When we forget about an activity, we become almost one with the movements along our precisely defined goals. During flow, no other thoughts distract us from the task at hand. In this case, anxiety and negative thoughts disappear. The importance of time ceases, there is no sense of time. Flow experiences provide a positive charge and are rewarding. In order to achieve the flow experience, it is important that the individual encounters a challenge that is optimal for his own abilities.
Small changes can make big changes. What do you gain from a hobby?
The list is non-exhaustive:
- It has a stress-reducing effect, as it supports introspection and reduces stress caused by external circumstances.
- Contributes to psychological well-being.
- It helps concentration.
- Increases the competence experience.
- Uploaded.
- It motivates.
- It gives positive feelings and experiences.
Image source: Pinterest; Translated by Viktória Szabó
Final thought
Everyone's life situation is different, and maybe it's not the right time to start a new hobby. Different life stages come and go, maybe the next one will be the one when you can imagine finding a lasting hobby for yourself. Maybe now is not the time to look for a new hobby, but it is worth walking around with open eyes and heart, constantly collecting your ideas. Pay attention to what you are interested in, what you would like to get into. Sometimes a hobby seems like a good idea at first, but when you get into it, you realize that it's not for you. There is nothing wrong with that, it often takes time to find what fills you up to the maximum. The search is also an exciting way, during which you gather experience and grow through it. It is worth striving to have several hobbies that you can fit into your everyday life. For example, hiking is a really good recreation that can be done either alone or with friends/family, but it is very weather-dependent, time-consuming and often requires more organization. In addition to such a hobby, it is worth finding something that can be done anywhere and at any time, such as reading, but crocheting is also like that. These hobbies can be good complements to each other so that you can create self-care for yourself on weekdays and weekends.
I wish you a good hobby search, try many things to find the best one for you!
If you are interested in how How did Rebekah find crocheting? read as a hobby My crochet story the article.
Sources:
The article was based on this writing: https://www.ourmindfullife.com/relaxing-hobbies/
Source: https://pszichoforyou.hu/az-ongondoskodas-fontossaga/
Mihály Csíkszentmihályi: Flow - The psychology of the perfect experience
Cover photo: Own (Rebeka Novák-Szabó ev)
